Abraham: An Appropriate Amount of Grief?

Abraham, Kansas City, KS  09/14/05

Abraham: How do you use your imagination?

Guest: I can't imagine not feeling grief if somebody that I love dies. And yet, you seem to be saying, "just get over it."  Is there an appropriate amount of grief? It's gotta be natural. If my dog died, I would just be floored.

Abraham: The perfect amount of grief is none, but you see...

Guest: How do you do that? You have your beloved dog there, and then he's not there and the relationship is different.

Abraham: We're going to go back and address that specifically, but before we do, we want to catch you in the trap that we've laid for you.

Guest: Okay. I'm willing.

Abraham: You're saying grief just seems inevitable under certain circumstances, and we say we know that there are things that are going to happen that are going to make you feel that way, but the emotion, the visceral feeling, that feeling in your body of grief, or fear, or despair, no matter what word you assign to it,  in every single case, it is because of your perception that something bad has happened to which you are having this awful emotional response and over which you have no control.

And we're just wanting to point out to you that while it is absolutely normal to have kneejerk responses to things that are happening, because of course you want that person, or that animal, to be in your experience longer,  you do have the ability to focus your way out of that grief.

We would not to say to anyone that you should not be sad when your mother dies, or when your father dies,  but we do want to say that the reason that you are sad is you've focused yourself in a way that is causing that sadness and you could just as easily focus yourself in a way that isn't so sad.

We watch people around funerals sometimes focusing in a way that brings them to their knees and makes them wail, and sometimes they focus in a way where the whole room laughs where they feel joy even though the circumstances have not changed. And it is that awareness that you can focus yourself...because you see the fear itself, or the negative emotion itself, the reason it feels so awful is, without exception, because of your perception of loss of control. Think about that.

© Abraham Hicks Publications

Death: What is the Actual Process?

Abraham, Burlingame, CA - 03/11/00 

Guest: I've heard you talk an a lot about death in the last year that... [Abe: We thought we were talking about life.] The thing that I'm still not complete with, is the actual process of the transition itself. I can think about after the transition and be very comfortable with that, but if I think about drowning or falling out of an airplane or some other horrible way of dying, I don't feel real comfortable with that.

Abraham: Do you ever have a bad dream? [Yes] And do you ever wake up right in the middle of it? [Yes] That's what death is like in those "horrible" situations you just described. In other words, right in the middle of something that you feel would be abhorrent or intolerable, you wake up into the reality of who you really are -- and it is like a distant dream that is not in your now.

[snip]

And so, we can understand how you would be a little confused about how you would feel about it. But we have to say to you, you live in this Universe that is always yielding good things to you, and that the transition into Nonphysical is like, in one fell swoop, leaving behind all worry and fear. But what happens is, you see it as something not wanted, and so you push against it. Most people are pushing so hard against this death thing that they are not allowing themselves to truly live. So, there are few of you that are really living in the free, good feeling, of this moment, that you could if you were releasing your fear of death.

If we were standing in your physical shoes we would begin saying, on a regular basis, "I love this physical experience. And as long as there are things that are drawing my attention, and as long as I am able to allow the Energy to flow through me, I want to run rambunctiously in this physical body. I want a long, healthy, happy physical experience. And when there are no longer things that are calling me, I will make my transition quickly."

In this physical time/space reality, it's pretty easy for you to utilize the contrast. You are becoming a global consciousness. You have lots of experiences, early in life experience. There is always more for you, but often you find yourself not able to find something more that you are wanting. But your Inner Being is never in that position. And in the moment that you spend time saying, "Well, I'm really not interested in that, and I'm really not interested in that," and you are not able to muster something that is summoning life through you, your Inner Being always says, "Well, there's plenty going on here, come on with us." So there is a withdrawal of your consciousness from here -- just like getting up and walking out of a movie that's no longer pleasing you, or leaving a conversation that doesn't feel good any more. But your consciousness does not miss a beat.

And so, the only question that we really want to talk about, relative to the death process, is not about the moment of death, that's a piece of cake. What we want to talk to you about is how much you are willing to endure not being fully connected to Source Energy before you make that decision.

We would far rather that all of you walk out and get run over by a truck, in the moment that you leave this building, than that you spend long lingering years worrying about one thing and another, and pinching the Life Force off, little by little. It is much more effective to just get it over with, reemerge into Nonphysical -- and then make another run at something that will summon more Energy through you.

That's what the beasts of your planet do. They come and go very easily because they're not worried about death. They know they're eternal beings. They are always fully focused in life. And they come to their full maturity faster and easier in life experience, and so they come in, they become mature, they experience the deliciousness of life, they make their transition -- and they come again, and again, and again and again. And you are the same.

© Abraham-Hicks Publications